Many people suffer from low self-esteem or an almost non-existent self-worth. The truth is that, in the vast majority of cases, it is down to the way we think and perceive ourselves.
There are many habits in life that diminish a persons self-esteem to low levels. You may be doing them and not even realising.
It’s essential, to live a happy and healthy life, that you learn to quiet the voice inside of you that tells you you’re not good enough.
The following are 4 behaviours that make this negative voice stronger – 4 ways you’re hurting your self esteem. By tackling these habits you take away the power from the negativity and will start seeing your true worth.
Focussing on Your Flaws
Only focussing on the negative areas you see in yourself and ignoring the bad, is incredibly damaging to your self esteem. An important thing to remember is that your flaws are ‘perceived’. This means that other people are not going to see them to the extent, if at all, that you do.
Start changing your focus onto the things that you do like about yourself. You like your smile, how you never break a promise, how you’re determined, how you like to take care of your friends etc. Positive physical and personality attributes.
Practice gratefulness. This involves taking time every morning to remind yourself of all the wonderful things you’re grateful for. This can be about you, the things that are in your life, basically anything that’s good in your life.
This shift in mindset allows you to think in a more positive manner and you’ll notice that those negative thoughts you were having about y
Not Making Yourself a Priority
Sure, it’s good to make time for others and help them when they need it, but you really need to make time for yourself as well. If you’re always at the bottom of the list, then you’re going to start feeling like that’s where you belong.
That’s not true at all. You can still be compassionate and kind while making your own life just as important as others. It’s all about balance and realising that it’s perfectly fine to say no every once and a while.
Book time for yourself. Let yourself fully relax and do the things you want to do. Even if this means you have to do them alone, so what? Checking in with ourselves and taking the time to treat ourselves to the things we want, heightens our self worth.
Comparing Yourself to Others
Comparing yourself to others is a pointless exercise and recipe for disaster. It’s easy to look in at someone’s life and see all the good things on display, but never know of the hardships they’re going through.
You cannot control other people and they can’t control you. If you want something then you need to make the decision to go and get it. Just because someone else has something, doesn’t mean you can’t achieve the same thing or better.
Stop looking at others and start focussing on yourself. Really look at the areas of your life that you’d like to improve. Now make a plan to achieve them.
Then it’s all on you. It’s up to you to go and get it and with the right type of perseverance you’ll achieve it. Now that’s a much better feeling that longing for something someone else has.
Settling for Less
Settling for less sends a message to yourself that that’s all you’re worth. Don’t settle when you know you’re worth so much more. If you don’t believe it then you need to start affirming that to yourself because you’re most definitely are.
Don’t think you can’t do better or be the person that always seems to take the fall. This isn’t healthy for you and you will come to believe that you’re not worth anything. You need to completely dismiss this and realise your full worth.
Similar to making yourself a priority, you need to step up and say “This isn’t right” when you feel that you’ve been forced to accept something that’s not good enough for you. Make the decision to change and start taking proactive measures to make sure you’re only reaching for the best.