Sometimes we are creatures of habit and we really don’t understand that these behaviours can be incredibly destructive. There are many shared things we do that prohibit the joy in life. Things that we have been doing for so long that we don’t even realise it.
If we can learn to stop these behaviours, we can live a life that is full of increasing joy, concentrating on the people and things that make us the happiest.
The following are 8 behaviours that are destroying your chance of happiness. You need to learn to stop doing them in order to live a happier, and healthier, existence….
…Fixating On What You Don’t Want
Because even though you’re saying that you don’t want it, acknowledgement gives power to the thought and you are feeling the fear of getting what you don;t want rather than the excitement of getting what you do want. Change your language, instead of saying you don’t want something, say you want the opposite. Catch your thoughts as well, they are just as powerful, if not more so, that spoken words.
…Holding On to the Past
Living in the past stops you living in your present, and you’re missing out on experiencing anything that is happening now. These regrets, or nostalgia for ‘What once was’ are incredibly damaging to your motivation and happiness. If you made a mistake, so what – you’re human. Opportunities will always come around again, so you need to make sure you’re ready for them. If a relationship didn’t work out then it wasn’t meant to, the one you really want is still to come. You are the combination of your past experiences, living in the now. Let it make you stronger and live life at its fullest.
Read our guide on letting go of the past.
…Running From Problems
You know why people usually run. Because they’re being chased. Running lends credibility to fear and will always lead to a problem snapping at your heels, always just waiting to pop out and surprise you head on. Turn around and face your problems; that is the only way you will ever solve them. No one can handle everything that’s thrown their way and sometimes life is a juggling act, that doesn’t mean you drop the balls, you just re focus and find your rhythm again. Problems are just experiences that are designed to teach us lessons and help us to evolve, don’t skip these lessons. At the end of the day, the only thing that will happen by facing them is that you will learn something and become more knowledgable.
…Being Someone You’re Not
In the wise words of Oscar Wilde; “Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.” The true path to happiness is to learn to love yourself. There will always be features or characteristics of someone that you think are better, if you look hard enough. Focus on you, there is no one else like you, no one else can do something the way you would do it. You are unique. There will never be another you. Why would you want to be someone else when it took a 1 in a trillion chance just to become you?
…Avoiding Making Mistakes
Make mistakes, make lots of them. This is how we learn. Failure is a part of life, no one gets through it without falling flat on their face a couple of times. You did? So what? You’re no different to anyone else, that doesn’t make you special. What will make you special is the ability to jump back up, dust yourself off and throw yourself right back in. You always regret the things you didn’t do over the things you did. Keep that in mind the next time you’re faced with trying something new.
It is impossible. You can purchase a temporary rush of pleasure or a release of endorphins. But no one can buy happiness. Happiness is non material, it is a moment, an experience, a person
we love, a connection to nature. All of which have the fantastic benefit of being free… start searching for real happiness and enjoy every second of the journey.
…Surrounding Yourself With The Wrong People
You are the sum of those you surround yourself this. As Jim john said, “You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.” Now this is definitely not to say, surround yourself with only the brightest, best looking people… far from it, that stuff is superficial for the main part. Instead, think of the people you spend time with. What are they qualities that you admire about them? Are they kind, compassionate, full of life, funny, caring, motivated, non-judgemental etc? Or instead do you catch them gossiping about others, judging, being nasty, uncaring and materialistic? Always remember you are the sum of this, so spend time with people that make you feel great about yourself and others, chances are if they like hanging around you, then you make them feel pretty good about themselves as well!
…Pretending you’re Fine
You’re not. No one can be fine all of the time, and if you are, you’ve stumbled across some kind of magic pill the pharmaceutical industry would sell their mothers for…
It is perfectly OK, not to be fine, to break down and cry, to release negative emotions. And that’s exactly what it is – a release. If you do not release the sadness, anxiety and other dark emotions that reside within you, they will build and consume you. Be emotional, no one expects you to be tough all of the time. We are human after all and the only species capable of producing tears that are linked with emotions…. use that ability when you need to.